Advice from an Albatross

Everyone knows how the power of positive thinking works. By thinking positively you are actively, even if subconsciously, doing positive things to improve your situation. Or that is how it is supposed to work.

Or maybe I’m just doing it wrong.

All of the “I think I can”s and “It will all work out”s have recently been replaced with “I don’t think I can do this anymore.” But then again, I haven’t always been positive. I’m more cyclic, as I’m sure many of you are. I have highs, where things are going well and I’m getting stuff done, and lows, where something comes out of no where and knocks me down a couple of pegs.

I’m currently riding the low.

But this current situation got me thinking. Was I being too optimistic? All the plans that we made when B would start her job, paying off the bills, being caught up, having money to put into savings, saving to buy a house, etc… Now we are to the point though that something needs to be done and done now. No more waiting. It is time to get realistic.

Now I’m not saying to forget thinking positive. There is validity in it. But we need to be real. Bad stuff happens, and it seems to happen all the time to us. That is a realization and not pessimism. Being realistic keeps you open to these truths in this life. Being optimistic only leads to heartbreak when they do happen. And I’m not talking about things in life that you can control. I’m talking about those you can’t.

But it is always more complicated then that. Here is my situation as an example.

B got a job but had to wait 2 months for it to start. What was out of our control is that it is delayed another 2 months. Nothing we can do about it. Our optimism kept us waiting those first two instead of B looking for a temporary one to fill the gap. She didn’t want to get a job just to leave it. I could have taken a second job as well. She didn’t want me to because the job she was waiting for would have her gone for an extended period so spending as much time together while we had it was more important. Now that we are realistic, we realize what needs to be done to get us back in control.

So I guess my point is there are things in life you can’t control. Being optimistic all the time means neglecting that and getting hurt. So be realistic on the positive side. Understand that there are things in life you can change. It is hard work but you can do it. You can’t expect it to go smoothly, but you can do things to make the ride just a little less bumpy.

This entry was posted on Monday, October 1st, 2007 at 10:56 am and is filed under